daily tales of dating disaster

I have a crush at work. :)

It’s been a rough few months. After my strange and deluded talk with Patrick, he basically began to withdraw from me more and more to the point where I haven’t seen him in about two months yet he’s still refusing to break it off (at least say it to my face).

I’m not holding out any longer, but I wish there was some sort of closure or at least a huge fight resulting in me breaking his stuff. I kid, I kid. But seriously, this is so anticlimactic. The past year we spent going on and off and this is how it ends?

Further news, I got a new job at a very famous and large publishing house, and I had an interview at Condenast for a teen magazine. The interview went fine, but I don’t think I was chic enough for them… plus the HR woman was a bit condescending and snobby. I expect that from editors and art directors, but from HR? Besides that, the pay was extremely low and I would have had to work a million hours a week. No amount of sample sales, hanging out in the Frank Gehry designed cafeteria, walking past models or Anna Wintour, and smoozing with the writers of The New Yorker is worth that. (So long childhood dreams of working at a magazine! Maybe someday we’ll meet again.) So, for now I’m sticking with my new job at a major publishing firm. Sure we don’t get celebrities everyday at the office, it feels great to be employeed and doing something semi-awesome.

I finally had “the talk” with Patrick. It went exactly how I predicted. He said he didn’t want a serious relationship. I said I was in love with him. He said he was sorry. A lot of other things were said, and a lot of back and forth.

We ended it with, “We’ll see what happens.” Which pretty much means that I’m a fool, a stubborn fool.

I ran into a very irritating David with girlfriend in tow that night. I had avoided him for nearly six months, but there he was that night chatting up my friends and making unnecessary comments about me. I pretty much could have cared less. Well, until the end of the night, while I was leaving, he stops me and puts his very drunken arm on my shoulder. “Hey, I hear you’re dating a great guy now. Well, even if that doesn’t work out, you should get yourself another guy because you’re a great girl.” I said thank you, returned his arm to him, and wished him a good night without throwing up.

Later, rumor has it, he did throw up on the train, his girlfriend almost got into two fights on the train with random strangers defending her boyfriend’s “honor”, and she went to bed angry at his flirtatious behavior at the party. Of course… I could care less.

My roommate is finally moving out. Time for an “awesome roommate” search! More like… time to panic about finding a weirdo stranger to live with.

Patrick and I are back to normal. Whatever the hell normal is… which I guess in his case, watching lots of tennis and football while ignoring me on aim. But I’m also scoring some brownie points with him brother by helping him get an internship at my previous magazine gig. Not feeling like his brother’s bitch-semi-gf is great! Now love me, damnit!

I also had a call back interview at a mega-giant publishing place today. I’m sure I blew the interview, but I hope I get the job anyways. Come on… my self-esteem needs this, and so does my bank statements.

This week is also my last week at my current job before I get laid off. Thanks jerks offs.

Why are things always happening at the same time?

I got into a fight with him last night. K. says it’s not over until someone says it’s over. I’m not so sure about that since he left me hanging with that last line… then blew me off for the rest of the night.

Seriously? I’m holding on to this? I don’t understand why he thinks he can treat me like this.